the news tells me every morning that things are bad. i've been considering panicking and downsizing in my personal life to reflect national trends. as for the panic, i tried to do the dishes with an attitude of irrational fear, but i'm afraid i wasn't able to do it. dried milk cannot be removed in haste. i did the dishes in my usual manner. to downsize, i told the cat that i was no longer able to keep her on the payroll. in response, she batted a plant and went to sleep. once again i am no good at following national fashion.
i looked closely at my own economic indicators and came to a different conclusion than the news does every morning.
1 it is cold outside, yet warm inside. good. 2. i saved $1.69 because the quicky mart was out of the pink sobe. good. 3. i am able to watch the justice league on my tv. good. 4. i have a wife who buys me dinner and drinks at the minnow. good. 5. the bag of baked cheetos in the kitchen is 4/5 full. good. 6. i got to hold a little girl named reagan makepeace who called me grampa with her eyes. great.
i have a hard time opening things, but i don't have the foresight to carry a knife. i fear my eyes are growing farther apart and my legs closer together. if i left the room, someone who doesn't know me might say, "who was that nervous guy standing on one leg?"