like devil worshipers, aliens have been known to mutilate cows and pigs. i remember that the aliens regularly lopped heads and udders and such from cows before they found the more peaceful farm activity of leaving designs in corn fields.
but the corn circle hobby must have gotten boring. they're back to mutilation, and they've chosen my backyard to begin.
they are severing the heads off of perfectly harmless tulips right at their prettiest. the plants are neatly nipped right below the flower, and the flowers are moved five to fifteen feet away.
the tulips stood proud amongst the mud and wild onions that early spring bring to the drizzly yard. now half are beheaded. their crime? being beautiful. aliens hate beauty. and cows. reward offered for the capture and mutilation of backyard aliens.